A little tribute to a huge legend

Hi,

On my recent travels I went to Bottle beach on Koh Phangan, Thailand. Max always use to tell me about this place so I made it my mission to check it out. Knowing he always knew about the best things to do and places to see I knew I couldn't go wrong.

It was quite an emotional day going from bar to bar trying to find someone who would remember him.
Just as I gave up, the manager called Nin from the Smile Bungalows recognized him from I picture I had with me. I knew I would find someone! It's hard to forget someone so magnetic and special as Max.
It was amazing to talk to this guy and hear some new stories I hadn't before.

While I was there I wanted to do something that would leave a piece of him forever so I found a rock on the left hand side of the beach and wrote a little something down.

I've attached a picture to this email, but in case it can't be seen well here is what I wrote.

'Max O' Connell

Like a pure magnet of energy we were drawn to him.
No words can sum up this angel that blessed us.
He changed us forever.

Thanks for coming into our lives.
Your spirit will stay with us forever.

Max loved Bottle beach and now I know why.
A piece of him lives on here forever.

Love you with all my heart Amigo.

RIP

I'll see you again some day.

Miss you

Marina'

First picture if of Nin ( the manager ) and me
Second is of the rock
Third is the view from the rock
Fourth is Smile Bungalows where Max stayed while he was there

... and the fixtures ... again

In Louis's earlier post the referee column got chopped off at the side. I tried to sort it out. I've got all the text to show but I can't get it into columns. Anyway, see you all tomorrow, Seamus


Group A


Jet Set NW10 vs. TranzBallerZ
Ref Cupid Stunts FC

Cupid Stunts FC vs. Dazzle Dogs
Ref JCB

JCB vs. Jet Set NW10
Ref TranzBallerZ

TranzBallerZ vs. Cupid Stunts FC
Ref Dazzle Dogs

Dazzle Dogs vs. JCB
Ref Jet Set NW10

Jet Set NW10 vs. Cupid Stunts FC
Ref JCB

TranzBallerZ vs. Dazzle Dogs
Ref Cupid Stunts FC

Cupid Stunts FC vs. JCB
Ref Dazzle Dogs

Jet Set NW10 vs. Dazzle Dogs
Ref TranzBallerZ

JCB vs. TranzBallerZ
Ref Jet Set NW10


Group B

Queens Park vs. South Kilburn
Ref NW2 United

NW2 United vs. Men Behaving Badly
Ref The People's Champions

The People's Champions vs. Queens Park
Ref South Kilburn

South Kilburn vs. NW2 United
Ref Men Behaving Badly

Men Behaving Badly vs. The People's Champions
Ref Queens Park

Queens Park vs. NW2 United
Ref The People's Champions

South Kilburn vs. Men Behaving Badly
Ref NW2 United

NW2 United vs. The People's Champions
Ref Men Behaving Badly

Queens Park vs. Men Behaving Badly
Ref South Kilburn

The People's Champions vs. South Kilburn
Ref Queens Park


Group C

Old Boys vs. West Hampstead
Ref Kilburn Grange FC

Kilburn Grange FC vs. Roy's Uffs
Ref Eximius FC

Eximius FC vs. Old Boys
Ref West Hampstead

West Hampstead vs. Kilburn Grange FC
Ref Roy's Uffs

Roy's Uffs vs. Eximius FC
Ref Old Boys

Old Boys vs. Kilburn Grange FC
Ref Eximius FC

West Hampstead vs. Roy's Uffs
Ref Kilburn Grange FC

Kilburn Grange FC vs. Eximius FC
Ref Roy's Uffs

Old Boys vs. Roy's Uffs
Ref West Hampstead

Eximius FC vs. West Hampstead
Ref Old Boys


Group D

ANP United vs. Geordie Southerners FC
Ref Ruislip

Ruislip vs. Cricklewood FC
Ref Kronenbourg 1664

Kronenbourg 1664 vs. ANP United
Ref Geordie Southerners FC

Geordie Southerners FC vs. Ruislip
Ref Cricklewood FC

Cricklewood FC vs. Kronenbourg 1664
Ref ANP United

ANP United vs. Ruislip
Ref Kronenbourg 1664

Geordie Southerners FC vs. Cricklewood FC
Ref Ruislip

Ruislip vs. Kronenbourg 1664
Ref Cricklewood FC

ANP United vs. Cricklewood FC
Ref Geordie Southerners FC

Kronenbourg 1664 vs. Geordie Southerners FC
Ref ANP United

Max

Just remembering a Great dude with the biggest smile and crazy rubber leg footy skills. Hope Crouchy and the boys do you proud this summer in S.A.
Big Love
Jayla

...and the fixtures...

Group A			Ref.
Jet Set NW10	vs.	TranzBallerZ	Cupid Stunts FC
Cupid Stunts FC	vs.	Dazzle Dogs	JCB
JCB	vs.	Jet Set NW10	TranzBallerZ
TranzBallerZ	vs.	Cupid Stunts FC	Dazzle Dogs
Dazzle Dogs	vs.	JCB	Jet Set NW10
Jet Set NW10	vs.	Cupid Stunts FC	JCB
TranzBallerZ	vs.	Dazzle Dogs	Cupid Stunts FC
Cupid Stunts FC	vs.	JCB	Dazzle Dogs
Jet Set NW10	vs.	Dazzle Dogs	TranzBallerZ
JCB	vs.	TranzBallerZ	Jet Set NW10
Group B
Queens Park	vs.	South Kilburn	NW2 United
NW2 United	vs.	Men Behaving Badly	The People's Champions
The People's Champions	vs.	Queens Park	South Kilburn
South Kilburn	vs.	NW2 United	Men Behaving Badly
Men Behaving Badly	vs.	The People's Champions	Queens Park
Queens Park	vs.	NW2 United	The People's Champions
South Kilburn	vs.	Men Behaving Badly	NW2 United
NW2 United	vs.	The People's Champions	Men Behaving Badly
Queens Park	vs.	Men Behaving Badly	South Kilburn
The People's Champions	vs.	South Kilburn	Queens Park
Group C
Old Boys	vs.	West Hampstead	Kilburn Grange FC
Kilburn Grange FC	vs.	Roy's Uffs	Eximius FC
Eximius FC	vs.	Old Boys	West Hampstead
West Hampstead	vs.	Kilburn Grange FC	Roy's Uffs
Roy's Uffs	vs.	Eximius FC	Old Boys
Old Boys	vs.	Kilburn Grange FC	Eximius FC
West Hampstead	vs.	Roy's Uffs	Kilburn Grange FC
Kilburn Grange FC	vs.	Eximius FC	Roy's Uffs
Old Boys	vs.	Roy's Uffs	West Hampstead
Eximius FC	vs.	West Hampstead	Old Boys
Group D
ANP United	vs.	Geordie Southerners FC	Ruislip
Ruislip	vs.	Cricklewood FC	Kronenbourg 1664
Kronenbourg 1664	vs.	ANP United	Geordie Southerners FC
Geordie Southerners FC	vs.	Ruislip	Cricklewood FC
Cricklewood FC	vs.	Kronenbourg 1664	ANP United
ANP United	vs.	Ruislip	Kronenbourg 1664
Geordie Southerners FC	vs.	Cricklewood FC	Ruislip
Ruislip	vs.	Kronenbourg 1664	Cricklewood FC
ANP United	vs.	Cricklewood FC	Geordie Southerners FC
Kronenbourg 1664	vs.	Geordie Southerners FC	ANP United

The Max O'Connell Cup 2010

These are the groups for the 2010 Max O'Connell Cup. It's the biggest turn out we've had so far - 20 teams - so make sure you are there at 11.00 to register, meet and greet everyone ready to KO your first game at 12.00. The place closes at 6.00 and the Champions League final is shortly after so please come early to leave on time.

It's supposed to be another hot day so make sure you're prepared!

As usual there will be some food and drinks and everyone is welcome so invite friends and family as we remember Max and play some good football.

There are also a few more prizes this year for the Winners, the Max of the Day and the top goal scorer.

So bring your "A" game...See you there!


Teams
1.   Queens Park (Us)
2.   West Hampstead (Leon)
3.   Old Boys (Robbo)
4.   TranzBallerZ (David Ferguson)
5.   South Kilburn (Scott Nelmes)
6.   Jet Set NW10 (Sam and Natty)
7.   Geordie Southerners FC (James, Eddie and Ku)
8.   ANP United (Little Chin)
9.   NW2 United (Mal and Niall)
10. Cupid Stunts FC (John McCormack)
11. JCB (JC and Blake)
12. Cricklewood FC (Nicky Kemp)
13. Men Behaving Badly (Dom and Jamie)
14. Eximius FC (James Mates)
15. The People's Champions (Joe Joyce)
16. Ruislip (Nick and Justin)
17. Dazzle Dogs (Rob)
18. Kronenbourg 1664 (John and Ritchie)
19. Roy's Uffs (Reedie)
20. Kilburn Grange FC (Twin)


Rules

Can't pass straight back to goalie
Goalie can't come out of area
Only headers and volleys can be scored in the area
No slidetackling
7 mins each way (group games)
8 mins each way (knock out games)
E.T. 4 mins each way
5 x pens each
Top 2 qualify for quarters
Goal Difference-goals scored-head to head-pens


Groups

Group A
-Jet Set NW10
-TranzBallerZ
-Cupid Stunts FC
-Dazzle Dogs
-JCB

Group B
-Queens Park
-South Kilburn
-NW2 United
-Men Behaving Badly
-The People's Champions

Group C
-Old Boys
-West Hampstead
-Kilburn Grange FC
-Roy's Uffs
-Eximius FC

Group D
-ANP United
-Geordie Southerners FC
-Ruislip
-Cricklewood FC
-Kronenbourg 1664

Recent trip to Cadiz

Dear all,

Im sorry I havent been in touch in such a long time but I thought I would share my recent trip to Cadiz with you all. I returned to Cadiz for the first time since that fateful night three weeks ago. I went to catch up with girls who now live there and also to I dont know how to put it, almost seek some closure. I left Cadiz two days after Max died in such a rush, so much emotion, it was a very dark time. Returning to the scene, was hard, very hard but something I had to do. I then went to the beach (Santa Maria de Soledad) that was opposite our flat, the sand was warm, the sea so blue, the current Erasmus students kicking a ball about, the guy selling beer and water up and down the beach, it was almost like going back in time. Looking at our humble balcony, I could picture us all sitting there, usually hungover and plotting the next attack on Cadiz's night life.....  Cadiz still has the stunning views, the views that were on the front cover of Max's guide to Andalucia, the local haunts still have the same bar people in places. Cadiz will always be a special but tragic place for me, its so bitter sweet. I gained so much, yet lost so much too. I miss Max, I miss him a lot but I will never forget him...

I trust you are all well. In my thoughts as always 

Cheryl xx

Max at the Kicks n Flicks Film Festival

Got this from Peter Cutts -

The film 'The Max O'Connell Cup' has been selected to feature at the Kicks n Flicks Film Festival (http://www.kicksnflicks.co.uk/).

It will be screened at the Shortwave Cinema London SE1 3UN (http://www.shortwavefilms.co.uk/) on Friday 7th May at 7.30pm and Saturday 8th May at 2pm as part of the 'Football Shorts' programme.

If you'd like to book tickets, visit www.kicksnflicks.webeden.co.uk

Seamus

Dear Max,

I haven't visited your blog for a very long time. It's because I know it will make me sad.

Summer is coming Max. The daffodils are in the Park. Boys are playing football. I cannot see you, but I hope you are around. Somewhere. Everywhere.

Sometimes I feel guilty for getting on with life without you, but I know, I know, you wouldn't want it any other way.

I miss you.

Rosie

New look to the blog

You will see that the blog has a new look. It should now be easier to browse the posts and find what you want.

Instead of one long window holding all the posts you now have a smaller window holding only some of the posts, with buttons at the bottom to go to older or newer posts. You also have a panel at the side through which you can home in on posts for a specific month.

There's also a Followers panel. I don't really understand that bit.

This change results from Google's introduction of the Layouts system for its blogs. If you know about all this let me know of any thoughts you have for changes or improvements.

Best wishes, Seamus

Hannah

I just wanted to say from all the way up here in Manchester that I have been thinking about lovely Max, Victoria, Seamus, Rachel the boys and all of the other wonderful Queens Park Mums, Dads, sisters, brothers and friends! I miss you all today and I wish I was with you. All my love and hugs! Here is remember someone we will never forget. Max O'connell. Legend!

Hannah Cutts

Glitch viewing the blog

At the moment you can't see the older posts in the blog. I'm working on it. Seamus

The Max O'Connell Cup 2007

Here's an edited version of a film I made a couple of years ago. When I set out to follow the Queen's Park team at the tournament I had no idea of the drama that would unfold.

Peter Cutts (Owen's Dad)

The Max O'Connell Cup 4th July 2009: Results

To paraphrase Leon Nelson, The Max of the Day player of the tournament, we'd all rather not be here, but we are, and it's the most fitting way to remember Max I think there is.

The fourth Max O'Connell Cup was another great occasion for the Max community who came to play or watch football and see old friends.

This year there were a few more babies and a few more new faces in amongst the regulars. The sun again shone down on this bitter-sweet occasion that mark's another years passing without Max.

West Hampstead deservedly won (4th year in a row!), but not before being pushed right to the limit in the thrilling 3-3 semi-final where an own goal helped them come back from 3-1 down in the second half. Once they drew level a single goal in the penalty shoot out was enough to get them to the final: a shoot out noted for containing 5 spectacular saves between the two keepers before the ice-cold winning penalty from Leon.

Queens Park had a shaky group stage and got the better of one penalty shoot out to get to the quarters before luck deserted them and they went out to Scott Nelmes (Salusbury Old Boys) in their second penalty confrontation despite a much improved display.

Scott Nelmes had a fantastic debut tournament making it all the way to the final before the heat and injuries meant they had little left for the final against the fittest team in the tournament. Newcastle finally lived up to their billing as contenders making it the semis before their lack of a single substitute was exposed and fatigue got the better of an otherwise strong outfit.

The groups proved testing and rewarding for the rest of us almost as much as the the cold beers, home cooked pizza and endless supply of fruit. It was a measure of the quality of this tournament that every team except The Brass Nanans got at least one win - The Brass Nanas however can claim for Goal of the Tournament from Callum.

A special thanks to Louis who's organisational skills meant the day ran as smoothly as it did, to the rest of Queens Park for chipping in, to the mums and parents for supplying such stellar catering (especially those cold beers - Max really would be proud of that), to Remel for running the bar, to Dave Ferguson for another T-shirt that doesn't let anyone forget that Max used to be called "Ducky", and to everyone else who came and played and watched and continues to help keep Max's spirit close.

There are a few photos below but if you have any more please post them or check out Facebook - Leon Nelson has a great set of pictures, and captions, that tell the story.

See you next year.

The Kite

Max was a friend of John and Mary McCormack’s sons, John, Mike, and Jamie. John wrote this poem for Max, and Mary has asked me to post it. It is included in John's selected poems, ‘The Trouble with Creation’, published in 2009.


The Kite (For Max)

A boy is like a kite,
bound yet free
and if the wind holds
there is mastery.

Sometimes it will obey
the tug of will against air,
yet a wayward gust may
take it away
anywhere in this sky.

The clouds can hide so much,
yet somewhere a kite is flying
free and wild as a
reckless friendly child.

John McCormack
2006

The Max O'Connell Cup 4th July 2009

Hello all,

This Saturday is the 4th Max O'Connell Cup at the Linford Christie Stadium. You can see last year's blog lower down the page for directions. 

You can check out your groups and who you are playing below! There are 15 teams this year, making it the biggest tournament by far.

Games are kicking off at 12.00 noon so try and get there in good time. It's £40 per team to be collected and sorted by the Captains before kick off so we have a good day of football ahead of us.

For those coming to support and those who make an early exit the parents are again very kindly providing some food and drink (but you can always bring more!)

We'd like to thank everyone in advance for still making the effort and wanting to be involved, it means a lot to us and it's good to see it means the same to so many of you.

The weather is looking good, let's play in the spirit that Max would have wanted and we'll see you there.

Queens Park 

-------------------

Teams		Rules
1.Queens Park		Can't pass straight back to goalie
2.West Hampstead		Goalie can't come out of area
3.Newcastle		No slidetackling
4.John McCormack		Only headers and volleys can be scored  in the area
5.John McKinney
6.Sam Greene
7.Natty
8.Dom/Rob
9.Nile
10.Dave Stars
11.Scott Nelmes
12.Big Chin
Groups
Group A		Group B		Group C
West Hampstead		Dave Stars		Scott Nelmes
Queens Park		Newcastle		John McKinney
Sam Greene		Dom/Rob		Big Chin
Nile		Natty		John McCormack

Group A			Ref.
West Hampstead	vs.	Queens Park	Sam Greene
Sam Greene	vs.	Nile	Queens Park
West Hampstead	vs.	Sam Greene	Nile
Queens Park	vs.	Nile	West Hampstead
West Hampstead	vs.	Nile	Sam Greene
Queens Park	vs.	Sam Greene	Nile

Group B			Ref.
Dave Stars	vs.	Newcastle	Dom/Rob
Dom/Rob	vs.	Natty	Newcastle
Dave Stars	vs.	Dom/Rob	Natty
Newcastle	vs.	Natty	Dave Stars
Dave Stars	vs.	Natty	Dom/Rob
Newcastle	vs.	Dom/Rob	Natty

Group C			Ref.
Scott Nelmes	vs.	John McKinney	Big Chin
Big Chin	vs.	John McCormack	John McKinney
Scott Nelmes	vs.	Big Chin	John McCormack
John McKinney	vs.	John McCormack	Scott Nelmes
Scott Nelmes	vs.	John McCormack	Big Chin
John McKinney	vs.	Big Chin	John McCormack

Poem read for Max on 26 February 2009

We had a gathering of friends and families at our house on the anniversary of Max's death. I read a poem, and I have been asked to put it on the blog.

Rachel had asked us to read this poem. This year she was in New York for the anniversary, continuing with her studies, but she was keen for us to read the poem. It is one she knew Max had liked, from an anthology called Poets of the Nicaraguan Revolution. It contains poems in Spanish with English translations.

I used Max's well-thumbed copy of the book, in which the poem has been annotated by him (and in pen - I used tell him off for that), and I read the English translation.

So here it is - Spanish first, then the English translation.

Seamus


ERNESTO CARDENAL

EN LA TUMBA DEL GUERRILLERO

Pienso en tu cuerpo que se ha ido desbaratando
bajo la tierra
haciéndose suave tierra, humus otra vez
junto con el humus de todos los demás humanos
que han existido y existirán en la bolita mundo
haciéndonos todos juncos tierra fértil del planeta Tierra.
Y cuando los cosmonautas miren esta bola azul y rosa
en la noche negra
lo que estarán mirando, lejos, es tu luminosa tumba
(tu tumba y la de todos)
y cuando los extraterrestres desde alguna parte
miren este punto de luz de la Tierra
estarán mirando tu tumba.
Y un día será todo tumba, silenciosa tumba,
y ya no habrá más seres vivos en el planeta
compañero.
¿Y después?
Después nos desbarataremos más, volaremos,
átomos en el cosmos.
Y tal vez la materia es eterna hermano
sin principio ni fin o tiene un fin
y recomienza cada vez.
Tu amor sí tuvo un comienzo pero no tiene final.
Y tus átomos que estuvieron en el suelo de Nicaragua,
tus átomos amorosos, que dieron la vida por amor,
ya verás, serán luz,
me imagino tus partículas en la vastedad cosmos
como pancartas, como afiches vivos.
No sé si me explico.
Lo que sé es que nunca se olvidará tu nombre
y para siempre se gritará: ¡Presente!


THE GUERRILLA'S TOMB

I think of your body that has been rotting
underground
becoming good earth, humus again
together with the humus of all the other humans
who have existed and will exist in the ball of the earth
all becoming fertile earth of the planet Earth.
And when the cosmonauts look at this blue and pink ball
in the black night
what they will be seeing, far off, is your luminous tomb
(your tomb and everybody's)
and when extraterrestrials from somewhere
see this point of light that is Earth
they will be looking at your tomb.
And one day it will be all tomb, a silent tomb
and there will no longer be living beings on the planet
comrade.
And then?
When we have disintegrated further, we shall fly,
as atoms in the cosmos.
And perhaps matter is eternal brother
without beginning or end or it ends
and keeps beginning again.
Yes, your love did have a beginning but it has no end.
And your atoms which were in the soil of Nicaragua,
your loving atoms, that gave their life for love,
you'll see, they will be light.
I imagine your particles in the vastness of the cosmos
like placards, like living posters.
I don't know if I am explaining myself.
What I do know is that your name
will never be forgotten
and for evermore you will be acclaimed: Presente!

From Poets of the Nicaraguan Revolution
Translated by Dinah Livingstone
Katabasis, 1993

Max's second tree

On Wednesday 3 December 2008 we planted a second tree for Max. The first one had never looked completely healthy. There were always a few branches that did not have any leaves, were in fact dead, and over two years this showed no improvement. It was very upsetting for us that Max's memorial was a damaged tree, and we told the Queen's Park managers that we would like to buy a new one.

The park managers were very sympathetic and helpful. They offered to buy the new tree, and arranged for two park keepers to drive us to a tree nursery where a specialist looked at trees with us and advised on the choice. The park then organised the transport of the tree to Queen's Park and on 3 December the tree was planted, with a few of us looking on.

The New tree is a Maple Autumn Blaze - the foliage goes a bright red in the autumn. So far it seems to be thriving and is now in leaf.

Some pictures of the tree being planted.

Victoria

4th October at the Irish

On 4th October Max would have been, should have been, celebrating his 26th birthday.

As many of you will remember, he always celebrated these occasions with much gusto. Perhaps he would have celebrated this birthday at the Irish, who can say.

The usual room has been booked there from 8pm on Saturday 4 October and it would be lovely if as many of you as possible could join us to remember him.

For the few who may not know the Irish, the new name is The Corrib Rest, Salusbury Road, London NW6.

Best wishes,
Victoria and Seamus

Football Tournament

The third Max O'Connell Football Tournament took place on Saturday 12 July at the Lynford Christie Sports Stadium. It was organised mainly by Louis Russell, who was unable to play owing to injury, and who instead spent a great deal of time and effort making sure everything ran in a smooth and trouble-free manner. Which it did, so congratulations to Louis.

I think there might have been more teams than last year; there certainly seemed to be a lot of people around, mainly players but spectators as well. Some of the Queen's Park parents provided food again, and Remel, Louis's nephew, organised the refreshments tent in a very cool and efficient manner.

Once again the Cup was won by the West Hampstead All Stars, who beat the Older Lot (maybe not their official title but the one I always hear them called) by 2 goals to 1. It was an exciting final, but in the end the West Hampstead team again seemed that much fresher and faster. The Max of the Day award went to Adam Newton, one of the winning side.

I find it hard to believe that there have now been three tournaments since Max died. For us it is a bitter-sweet occasion, so sad that it should be taking place at all, but also such a pleasure that so many of his friends want to remember him in this way. It is surely the most fitting celebration of his life. We would like to thank the organisers, and all those who took part and made the Tournament an exciting and enjoyable, if exhausting, day.

The winners - West Hampstead All Stars


Max used to be No 10
David's T shirt




The Queen's Park team shirt


Please feel free to add more photos.

Victoria

Max O'Connell Cup Note

Hi all,

I'm sad that I won't be able to attend this year's football celebration.

I've wanted to type something on this blog for a while but I haven't been able to find the right words.

I've lived in the States for 5 years, and I simply can't think of football, or home, without thinking of Max and the Queen's Park crew. There's something really special about the community we all formed there, parents and kids... and there's nothing like kicking a ball about with you guys. Have a great day tomorrow!

I wanna take this chance to pay homage to the Paddington Boys (1996-7?) football team, of which Max was a member. I'm now being paid to do something that I would gladly do for free, coach football. But my career and practical education started with you guys. I learned alot with you and every success, every victory is yours.

A big hug to all of Max's loved ones.

Have a great summer!

Pedro.

Max O'Connell Cup 2008

Hello all, 

the Max O'Connell Cup will be held on Saturday 12th July this year at the Linford Christie Stadium. Same as last year for all those that came along, for those that didn't it is next to Wormwood Scrubs with the entrance and car park down Artillery Lane, off Du Cane Road.

Click here for directions

At the moment it looks like we've got twelve teams which will mean three groups of four. It is six-a-side and will cost £35 per team. We hoping to kick off at noon so we should all aim to meet there at around elevenish. Depending how it all goes it should run until six. My number is 07947449854 if anyone wants to put a team in or needs directions.

There will be food and drinks for those who want to come and watch, but all help would of course be much appreciated.

Look forward to seeing you all there...

Louis

Remembering Max

On the evening of 26 February a group of us met together to remember Max, and also of course to catch up with one another's lives, and to wonder what Max might have been doing now, had he lived. We lit twenty-three candles, one for each year of his life, and Peter Cutts, Owen's father, read a poem by Brian Patten which seemed to express so well our thoughts about loss and remembrance.


So Many Different Lengths of Time

Cuanto vive el hombre por fin? Vive mil dias o uno solo?
Una semana o varios siglos? Por cuanto tiempo muere el hombre?
Que quiere decir 'para siempre'?
Preocupado per este asunto me dedique a aclarar las cosas.

— PABLO NERUDA

How long is a man's life, finally?
Is it a thousand days, or only one?
One week, or a few centuries?
How long does a man's death last?
And what do we mean when we say, 'gone forever'?

Adrift in such preoccupations, we seek clarification.
We can go to the philosophers
but they will grow tired of our questions.
We can go to the priests and the rabbis
but they might be too busy with administrations.

* * *

So, how long does a man live, finally?
And how much does he live while he lives?
We fret, and ask so many questions —
then when it comes to us
the answer is so simple.

A man lives for as long as we carry him inside us,
for as long as we carry the harvest of his dreams,
for as long as we ourselves live,
holding memories in common, a man lives.

His lover will carry his man's scent, his touch;
his children will carry the weight of his love.
One friend will carry his arguments,
another will hum his favourite tunes,
another will still share his terrors.

And the days will pass with baffled faces,
then the weeks, then the months,
then there will be a day when no question is asked,
and the knots of grief will loosen in the stomach,
and the puffed faces will calm.
And on that day he will not have ceased,
but will have ceased to be separated by death.
How long does a man live, finally?

A man lives so many different lengths of time.

BRIAN PATTEN (1946-)

Max supported Spurs

Max in a Spurs top with a suitable expression on his face.

Requested by Owain Thomas, Little O.


Was taken when on holiday in Spain with Dash. Might have been the year of an earlier Spurs success.

Two years on

For the past week or so I’ve found my self thinking about Max a lot as the 2 year anniversary of that terrible night in Cadiz approached. Not so much with sad thoughts as it was at this time a year ago, but memories that make me smile and laugh and also to a growing extent, thoughts of what life would be like if Max were still here with us. I usually imagine him living nearby in Newcastle. I imagine how much he would have enjoyed the flat that I live in for two main reasons. Firstly, we have all the sports channels and four fanatical football watchers. I think he would have enjoyed taking part in some of the heated football debates and the ‘who’s the best’ conversations that regularly emerge. And secondly, we have a long living room that is filled with balls of all types, and we often just kick a football up and down the living room. I remember a bunch of footballing lessons that Max taught me in Cadiz, sometimes on a pitch but more often than not in our spacious, cockroach infested kitchen (using a volleyball as a stand-in for a real football) so I think he would have relished the chance to ‘teach us’ (aka show off) his football skills. Another thing which has brought Max to the forefront of my mind was the Carling Cup football on Sunday. Such a fitting tribute to Max that his team has won the cup on that Sunday which marked the two years.

I have also just been to visit Max’s tree in the Newcastle Uni campus. It is nice to see that it is standing up, tall and strong, to all the things that life has to throw at it (most prominent of which is the ridiculous amount of wind around Newcastle today). I’m very pleased to see how symbolic the tree has become, not only in reflecting Max’s personality and physique but also showing how it is possible to stand up tall and strong even in difficult times such as this. Also, there was a beautiful bouquet of flowers at the foot of the tree from Max’s family. As always, my thoughts and most sincere sympathy is with you and with all of Max’s friends.

And finally, a message to Max. We all miss you, mate. The two years that have passed have possibly dulled some of the pain I felt but the joyful memories live on and will continue to live on inside me while I still draw breath. I hope you’re up there right now teaching everyone you meet the wonders and joys of attacking football in the enthusiastic and infectious manner that only you can pull off. Thanks for being there and making the short time I knew you such a fantastic time. Take care, Max.

Gary