To Max, From Anna

The last time I saw you Max was in early January. I’d just found out you’d missed your flight to Spain (for the second time I believe) and was walking past your house so decided to call round. We chatted for about an hour, drank tea. You smoked a cigarette in the garden, I told you I’d given up. You really wanted to know about how I was doing, what I’d been up to, things that were new. You told me about Spain. It sounded like you were having a brilliant time and you seemed so happy there. You filled me in on the busy weeks you’d spent in London, whether it was witnessing a shooting in Brixton or getting your fair share of female attention – you’d been having lots of fun and seemed happy about that too! We made plans to meet up in Barcelona, you wanted to visit Dave and Rhys but didn’t want to go without me and we also decided that we’d all try and make it to Benicassim for the music festival in the summer. As ever you asked after Rosy. I remember leaving feeling so happy that I’d decided to pop in and say hi, I’d seen you on occasions over Christmas but we hadn’t properly caught up in ages. It had been so nice talking to you. Now, I can’t explain how important that short time means to me. It feels so strange going to your house now and you’re not there.

In all the time I’ve known you – as tiny toddlers, scrawny kids, spotty teenagers and adults living out our dreams – I could never have imagined or predicted this tragedy upsetting our secure, tight-knit, loving group of friends. I could never have imagined that I’d be left regretting not telling you how much I loved you and what an amazing and irreplaceable friend you are.

You were the most positive and fun-loving person I’ve known and hopefully that part of you has rubbed off on all of us and we’ll be able to use that to get through this.

I hope when you were alive you knew just how much people loved and admired you. You touched so many people’s lives and your leaving has changed our lives forever.

With all my love, always, Anna x